


Smaradhana

by grexigone



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Gen, Porn with Feelings, Romance, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-16
Updated: 2017-05-24
Packaged: 2018-11-01 15:21:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,021
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10924578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grexigone/pseuds/grexigone
Summary: Cassian notice that Jyn was different, but before he could ever ask why or what, a mission gone wrong and Jyn's life might be in great danger.





	1. Amin dele ten' he

"How much more do we have, you think?"

 

Cassian turned his head to caught Jyn's face through the corner of his eyes. He was sitting in front of her, the right sleeve of his shirt was completely ripped by her to have a better look at the blaster grease on his upper arm. She put a bacta patch after cleaning the wound, took a split second to check on her own, already being taken care of just moments ago.

 

"What do you mean?" he asked in return.

 

She gave a pat on the wound, a sign that she's done, but Cassian didn't move.

 

"Luck, or anything it is that we've been wasting since Jedha," Jyn's tone was soft with a hint of mock. Cassian turned slightly so he could see her expression. The strength and determination that she always carry was still there, so he knotted his brows in confusion.

 

"We've been dodging death for far too often," Jyn continued after a sigh. "Alone, since we were children, and together since Jedha. We did it again today, and I couldn't help but thinking that this.... survival slots will run out sometimes. And worst, you and I may have different amount of slots left, so either you will spend yours first or I will."

 

Cassian took a good two seconds to process her words before he himself let out a long heavy sigh.

 

"I don't know," It was an honest answer, as true as her question. He looked down from her eyes to the torn fabric on the side of her thigh where a bacta path lie just above a blaster grease she took on herself earlier. "The fact of us surviving was always enough for me."

 

Jyn gave him a sad smile, almost identical with the one she did on Scariff's beach but this time, it was him that made the initiative to tangled her fingers in his. She scoffed then leaning forward to give him a chaste kiss to his temple.

 

“The more you know about all this ‘us’ things, huh?” Cassian smiled at that. It was a new thing for him too, having someone who wanted to know whether you are safe and able to make it back home, or that feeling of contentment when they realized they returned to the base at the same time after a separate mission.

 

“And what do you find this time?” he asked.

 

Jyn stood up. The smile had completely gone from her face but their fingers were still tangled.

 

“That caring means constantly worrying.”

 

And with that, she released her hand and walked away. Bodhi’s voice was heard some moments later from the cockpit as he and Jyn discussed about their recent mission, with K-2SO’s flat metallic one added later. Cassian sighed and checked on his wound, but her words lingered on his mind in a too distracting way. There was something on Jyn’s tone that somehow pained him.

 

She sounded sceptic, and it raised an alarm in his heart.

 

The last time Jyn sounded this sceptic was on Jedha, after he told her about his plan on giving her name to his contact and hope that it would get them a meeting with Saw Garrera. Afterwards, she was nothing but fire. A new fuel to the Alliance that made it possible to destroy the Empire’s weapon of mass destruction. Cassian had also confessed to her long ago that it was always her that pushed him forward. He had climbed the citadel tower for her; he literally dragged himself to the last shuttle that saved them from Scariff because she keeps whispering to him to stay with her; and he _made_ himself to heal quickly so he could be there when she opened her eyes on the med bay. Later on, it has been the reason why, according to K-2SO’s calculation, his recklessness rate had decreased to 21,2%. Because he needed to come back home to her.

 

Jyn was sceptic because she didn’t have hope before, that their mission to Jedha would only be a quick one, traded for freedom. Or so Cassian liked to think. It was harder to imagine what would be the consequences if she does once again.

 

Most likely she would leave the Rebellion, of course, disappear behind a series of aliases like before. This theory was easier to accept than the second possibility, the one Jyn once mentioned to him about her time in Wobani. The thought of it alone had left him with a feeling like someone had punched his heart with ice, so Cassian put all the thoughts behind.

 

He made up his mind to talk about this again when they had landed on the base, then make his way to join Bodhi, Jyn and the ex-Imperial droid at the cockpit.

 

 

***

 

 

The Rebel Alliance was not a place for keeping promises, and it would never be. There was never a fixed routine or schedule for everyone in the front line, and people were rarely stay in one place for a long time. It’s a silently accepted terms, and therefore no one had ever been stupid enough to make one.

  

Yet Cassian made one, though. He felt like he just had to.

 

“I’ll come back to you, Jyn. Do you hear me? No matter where you are, I’ll keep coming back for you.” It was before they both went on a separate mission that would last for five months.

 

“I know,” she replied. Her eyes were burning with determination and something he guessed as happiness. “You better be, Andor. If you’re not in the base by then—if you dare to be late even by _hours_ , I will steal a ship and get you home immediately, and Draven or the other can kiss my ass if they ever try to stop me.”

  

“I can imagine,” and he smiled at the thought that Jyn would finally have a reason to punch the General.

 

Now his own promise kept re-playing in his head as he stormed into the War Room, Mon Mothma, General Draven, and Princess Leia were in the middle of an intense discussion.

 

“At ease, Captain Andor,” said the Princess impatiently.

 

“I’m aware that I was summoned immediately for a mission…”

 

“An extraction, Captain,” she cut him again. “Unfortunately time is not on our side, so you will depart in one hour. Will that be enough to gather the remaining Rogue One crew?”

 

“I’ll do my best, M’am.”

 

“Good. General?”

 

Draven stepped forward at the cue and handed over a datapad to Cassian. It showed a holo map of a fortress city, which he recognized as Haashimut. A terrifying cold suddenly crept on his spine.

 

“The last encrypted relay from Sergeant Dameron confirmed that their last known position was here,” he pointed out to a glowing dot on the map before continuing. “They managed to identify the local partisan loyal to the Empire, who had taken control on the fortress city after the Battle of Endor. The Pathfinder team was later ambushed, and Sergeant Demeron’s and 5 other members of his team managed to escape just in time and currently hiding here.” Another dot pointed. Cassian felt his jaws clenched.

  

“How about the rest of the team?”

 

“Sergeant Demeron confirmed that three people were captured: Sergeant Erso, Private Aron, and Private Carvi. You and Rogue One team will act as back up, providing Sergeant Demeron with additional weaponry to extract the hostages. The current ‘truce’ will only last for two days, and we just wasted one.”

 

Cassian swallowed hard. His heartbeat increased sharply and but no matter how strong he clenched his fists to calm himself, he could still hear it thumping loudly in his ears. Running outside from the room right now would save them a lot of time but he needed more information.

  

“What’s at stake, Sir?”

  

Draven’s expression tightened.

 

“Quite a lot, Captain. Sergeant Erso had managed to extract information from their system about the partisan’s network in three other planets, put it into a drive and handed it to Sergeant Dameron before she was captured. Their current demand was for such info to be returned to them, or in return they will do anything to squeeze information from Sergeant Erso about our whereabouts and activities. Sergeant Dameron made it clear that he is not in the position to leave any of his team member behind.”

 

The cold punch to his heart returned as Cassian tried to calm his voice.

 

“Understood, Sir.”

 

“Good,” Princess Leia stepped closer, his big brown eyes fixed on him as she speaks. “I want to see your ship take flight at 1500, Captain. And please bring them back, they are too good to lose. I believe you understand that.” The last words were spoken in a very soft tone Cassian sure he never heard before from the Princess. But again, she got a knack in reading people, much similar to Jyn.

 

“I do, Ma’am.” He added after a pause, “Thank you.”

 

There was no need to keep his cool demeanor outside the War Room anymore, so the moment he stepped out of it, Cassian Andor ran like it’s a matter of his life and death.

 

Mostly it was.

 

 

***

 

 

Finding Baze would be the easiest one, basically because he’s taller and bigger than most people in the Rebel Base, and he’s wearing a red armor that was easy enough to spot. Other reason was also because he came in a package with Chirrut.

 

Cassian spotted them at the hangar, sitting silently above three big boxes of weapons. Baze was doing something with his repeater gun, and Chirrut smiled calmly to Cassian’s direction as he came closer.

 

“All set, Captain,” the monk said once he’s within speaking range.

 

“What—“

  

“I told him ten people would be enough, but he recommends more. What’s your call, Captain?” Baze pointed to the nearest ship with his chin, where Cassian saw a group of people already packed inside it, as well as Bodhi, K-2SO, and Melshi currently stood outside, discussing something in haste.

  

He had lost count on how many times he asked ' _how do you know?'_  to Chirrut, to which he always patiently replied with _'the Force is strong'_.

  

“Captain?” Both Guardians were standing up now, ready for Cassian’s command. How foreign it was, he thought in a split second, the feeling of having a family. Having something made ready for you before you even asked.

 

“I think all is set and we’re ready to depart.” Cassian said with the best smile he could put on. It’s not easy to _feel_ anything knowing that Jyn was out there, probably seconds to her death. But after a pause he added, “Thank you.”

 

“Save the sentiment, Captain. Now let’s rescue my little sister.”

 

The briefing was to be conducted alongside Kes Dameron’s team once they arrive, so the team spent most of their journey in silence or small chit chat. One of the crew had been on a mission to the planet before, so he provided them with enough information about the geography and climate of Haashimut. The partisan, on the other hand, was widely known yet very little information has ever been gathered on their activities.

 

Cassian spent most of the journey being in the cockpit with K-2 and Bodhi, simply because it’s easier to listen to statistic facts constantly provided by the droid rather than let his mind wander to whatever it is that currently happened to Jyn. He noticed, however, that Bodhi kept checking at the chrono for reasons he could wholeheartedly understand.

 

“We are breaking the hyperspace in two hours. An encrypted message from Sergeant Dameron had provided us with coordinates of a point safe enough to land our ship. They will meet us there.” K-2 blinked once and started poking on the controls in front of him to start the calculation.

 

“We still have time, right?” Bodhi asked slowly. His face was tense.

 

“The truce will end in 10 hours by the time we landed. An extraction mission statistically only requires 4 to 8 hours.”

 

Bodhi fidgeted. His left foot tapping consistently at the metal floor. “Have you also calculate the possibility of the partisans not honoring the truce? I mean—I’ve worked with the Empire for long and they are not famous for keeping ‘promises’ with their enemy…”

 

“Bodhi,” Cassian stepped to the space between the pilots and squeezed his shoulder. He didn’t look up to him and instead stare at K-2.

 

“They are known for their fearlessness and brutality. That’s what made them a favorite ally to the Empire. I’ve heard countless stories about them so yeah, I worry. I worry a lot.” Another cold punch to the heart. Cassian swallowed hard.

 

“We have time. We will save them.” He said it more to himself than to Bodhi.

 

“We must,” the ex-Imperial pilot added.

 

The next two hours in the hyperspace ran excruciatingly slow. Melshi distracted the additional crew with stories about his last two missions, but nothing can fully remove the heavy thought from Rogue One team. Cassian cathed Baze mumbling something like prayer although he immediately stopped upon noticing his stare, while Chirrut, instead, remain silent. Cassian chose to seat beside him.

 

“Don’t worry, Captain. She’s alive. I can feel it.”

 

But even he cannot hide the less-optimistic tone in his voice. Yes, she’s alive, but for how long? Bodhi was right. If anything, they have no reason to rely on the partisan’s deal. They may have succeeded in getting what they want and moved to massacre the rest of Kes Dameron’s team. Cassian decided not to entertain this possibility.

 

The memory of their conversation after their last mission together popped up in his mind. Of course he hadn’t got the chance to _talk_ about it with her afterwards, since each of them were welcomed at the base with _more_ works to do, more missions to attend to, and suddenly Cassian realized why he’s more _terrified_ now than previous occasions where Jyn had also put her life in danger. So terrified in fact, that it numbed his senses.

 

He never believed in the Force even after meeting with Luke Skywalker, nor he ever think about praying. But, as Chirrut quietly mumbled his litany— _I am one with Force and the Force is with me_ —Cassian let himself reciting the words in his heart.

 

 

***

 

 

The last time he saw Jyn alive and well and wrapped in his arm. It was more than two weeks ago. Cassian had woke up to her green eyes looking at him with such gentleness still foreign to him. He blinked several times to adjust with the light in the their room (technically her room), and realized she was fully dressed, down to the boots.

 

“Good morning,” she said. She pulled his chin with one hand to plant a kiss to the tip of his nose. Jyn was all smiling and the idea to save her curent expression into a holo picture that Cassian could carry with him anywhere popped up in his mind for the millionth time.

 

“Why you so hurried up?” he asked with a hoarse voice. Jyn’s smile only got wider.

 

“It’s almost midday, Cassian. You slept like a dead man.”

  

He lifted one hand to rub his face before checking the chrono nearby. She was right. He groaned lazily and put his hand back around Jyn. She chuckled.

 

“You didn’t even wake up when I dropped my blaster while I changed.”

 

“Excuse me,” Cassian stared at her through his lashes. “I was tired from last night’s activity.”

 

“It’s not my fault you took forever to come,”

 

“Well, I wasn’t expecting any intercourse last night,”

 

“Yet you did absolutely _nothing_ to stop me.”

 

Cassian chuckled shot her the look that says ‘ _how do you even expect me to stop you_ ’ and she pulled him for a kiss. He never thought he could enjoy such luxury of a company before, other than a droid or other comrades. He had, at some point, thought that having a relationship as a Rebellion would be so unprofessional and unnecessary.

 

The thought has long but gone.

 

“Scoot away, I got to go now.” Jyn pulled away one of his hand gently and swing her foot to the floor. Cassian automatically grabbed her wrist.

 

“Last night you said you’ll be leaving at 1200.”

  

“I do.”

 

“You still have one hour.”

 

“Yes, but I need to make sure some of the equipment has been loaded to the ship. Those new recruits in our team, they tend to miss some parts,” she let out an annoyed sigh and pushed herself to sit on the edge of the cot. Cassian, still lying in his side, tugged the wrist he was holding strong enough that Jyn fell on her back beside him with a surprise gasp.

 

Using one of his leg, he caged Jyn’s and slipped his arm around her neck, keeping her in vulnerable position.

 

“Alright, big boy, I really has no time for this,” Jyn tried to pry herself from his grips but her size did her no good against Cassian and she was not in the mood to actually have to _fight_ her way out.

 

Of course it only made Cassian tightened his grip around her.

 

“Checking will only cost you 10 minutes, Jyn,” he growled to her ear, his breath was hot on her neck.

 

“Fine. I want to sneak some food too because I tend to feel hungry on the way. Now. You. Let. Me. Go.”

 

“Or what?” Cassian let go of her wrist and trail his fingers on her stomach and down. He used his other hand to tilt her head where his mouth welcomed hers eagerly.

 

“What do you think you’re doing?” she asked, voice husky and breathless between their kisses.

  

“I asked first.” His let his tongue dance inside Jyn’s mouth, preventing any response she wanted to say, while his fingers steadily move down and down, until he reached her trousers and unbuttoned it in one quick snap.

 

“I don’t want to fight you,” she whispered before her mouth was captured once again. He knew, of course, that she _really_ didn’t have much time, so without hesitation Cassian slipped his hand inside her underwear. He moaned to her mouth as he found that she’s already wet.

 

“What’s this?” Cassian asked teasingly. Before Jyn could say anything, he put one, then two fingers inside her and she shuddered in response.

 

“ _Fuck, Cassian,_ ” Jyn broke the kiss with a loud groan and threw her head back as the wave of pleasure slowly crept through her body. Cassian took this chance to nibble on ear and bit the skin behind it. Each shudder she produced only made him repeat what he’s done with more intensity.

 

He unhooked his leg from Jyn’s to gently pull them apart and used this chance to deepened his fingers. Jyn groaned loudly in response as she lifted her hands and rest them on each of his arms, digging her nails which definitely would leave marks later.

 

“Oh, you want me to stop?” Another tease, but Jyn had lost any control on herself to mutter any response, so Cassian took this cue and let his fingers move faster and faster in an out of her. Jyn gritted her teeth and shot a sharp hiss while her back arched up in pleasure, moving her hips to match his thrust with the same intensity. She was close and he knew it.

 

“Come on, Jyn,” Cassian’s words were hot on her ears and after a few more quick thrust, she came brilliantly hard, her whole body shuddered and her fingernails dug deeper to his arms. Eyes tightly shut, Jyn moaned deliciously as the wave of orgasm washed over her, and Cassian growled as he felt her insides clenched over his fingers, before pulling them out.

 

As her heartbeat evened out and her senses returned from its temporary numbness, Jyn swung one of hand and slapped at Cassian’s cheek playfully to his surprise. He could not contain his laugh, which soon resonated to her as they both enjoy their last precious moment together before being separated by mission for Force know how long.

 

“Great, now I got less than 20 minutes to prepare for my flight, you crazy Wampa.” In one swift move, Jyn stood up, straightened her shirt and buttoned her trousers before hauling up her backpack and make her way to the door. The ghost of her laugh still lingers on her lips.

 

“Hey,” Cassian said softly. Jyn stopped and turned around to see Cassian already followed her to the door, closed the remaining distance with both hands lifted to cupped her cheek as he pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Come back to me, okay?”

 

“I will.” The door open with a hiss and she made her way out of their quarter.

 

“In one piece, Jyn.”

 

She didn’t look back as she yelled her response, “You too, Captain.”

 

  

***

 

 

_She said she will come back…_

 

Cassian opened his eyes just in time to see Bodhi stepped out from the cockpit to announce that they would jumped out from hyperspace in 5 minutes. Melshi cue the crew to get prepared, and Cassian felt a hand had rested in his shoulder. Chirrut nodded once, a calm determination drawn in his face. It was enough to let out the breath Cassian didn’t realize he was holding.

 

_…and if she can’t, then I will find and bring her home._


	2. Lye nuquernuva sen e dagor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A well-executed rescue plan didn't always guarantee a good final result.

Haashimut, as Cassian immediately recalled, was almost similar to Jedha but instead of rocky mountain and sand, it was made of dormant volcanoes that painted the surrounding area in black. Bodhi managed to land safely behind the shade of an enormous rocky mountain. On the slope of the mountain there was a small cave out of which Kes Dameron and his Pathfinder team came to welcome them.

 

“Sergeant Dameron,” Cassian greeted him.

 

“Seriously, Cassian?” Kes’ lips quirked upward into a smirk then he moved forward to pull Cassian into a tight embrace.

 

Cassian huffed a relief laugh before pulling away to look at him. “You look terrible, Kes.”

 

“Well, I wasn’t, at least 2 days ago. I see you brought your best people.” Kes waved his hand towards Rogue One team.

 

“More like people that I can trust my life with. What’s our situation?”

 

Kes’ face hardened as he answered, “Not good. We made a mistake by landing our ship in a less shady area so now there are several partisans guarding it. Luckily we found this cave for temporary shelter.”

 

“We’ll take it back after we rescue J—your team. Who are we facing here, Kes?”

 

“Let’s talk more inside the cave. My team and I might also need some food.”

 

Kes seemed to pick up Cassian’s hesitation because afterwards he added, “We still have time, Cassian.”

 

“I know,” he responded, more out of habit than an actual certainty.

 

As soon as they settle inside the cave, K-2 made use of the data drive obtained by Jyn to access the fortress’ map and convert it into a holo image to be displayed. Again, the fortress’ structure reminded Cassian of Saw’s base in Jedha but instead of rock, this place was _made_ entirely of a dormant volcano. The inside part has been carved out and made into a 4-level base and the solidified magma that covered its top made quite a good shelter for the partisans.

 

“The fortress only has one entrance,” the droid began, “But I cannot obtain any information on their artilleries nor the exact number of people guarding the place. Looking at the size, it may range from 50 to 100 people.”

 

“Which means sneaking inside the place is not the best option.” Kes said slowly.

 

“Agreed. We have to draw them out. Who’s their leader?”

 

With one click, the holo map was replaced with a face of a female near-human.

 

“Name: Rhaj Nuala. Former slave for the Imperial mines. Involved in a fight with her fellow slave when she was 13 years old, during which she five Stormtroopers without using any weapon. She was personally recruited by the Emperor who was impressed by her skill afterwards. Rhaj Nuala joined this Imperial loyalist partisan soon after the fall of the Empire.”

 

Cassian tried hard not to think a scream-filled torture room that he almost skipped Bodhi’s voice.

 

“The top is fragile,” the pilot said. All eyes snapped to him. “I delivered cargos to a place like that once, when I was still…well, the whole roof was collapsed when someone accidentally destroyed the middle column—its main foundation.”

 

“You mean we have to blow up that one?” Melshi pointed out a large column on the holo map, which stretched from the first level up to the mountain top. Bodhi nodded.

 

“I can get inside,” Chirrut initiated. “Surely nobody will hurt a blind man.”

 

“I’ll escort you, Master Imwe.” Kes added, tapping the monk gently on his shoulder.

 

All eyes were on Cassian, waiting for his final call. He looked at K-2, waiting for the droid to provide any numbers on the successful chance of the plan, but he only blinked. Normally Cassian would go over and over again on the details of the mission, but right now they—and Jyn—has no luxury to spend any time for that. He closed his eyes, trying to imagine the assuring nod she always gave whenever he has to make difficult decisions.

 

“Sounds good enough.”

 

 

***

 

 

The Rebels finally got a visual of the lonely fortress stood tall in the middle of a rocky plains that was surrounded by several other dormant-mountain, as they move carefully towards their positions. Bodhi had stayed behind to guard their ship, and Cassian took several of Kes’ best shooters to the nearest mountain slope, rifles ready in sniper configurations.

 

“Talk to me, Melshi,” he spoke through the commlink.

 

Behind large rocks on the ground below, Melshi performed a final check with the remaining Rebels before giving the cue for Kes and Chirrut to go. “All in position, standing by. Sergeant Dameron and Master Imwe are moving towards the entrance.”

 

A hundred meter from the cave that was the entrance, both men stopped and Kes announced his demand to speak with Rhaj Nuala. An uncomfortable silence stretched for a good one minute before several partisans suddenly came scrambled out of the fortress, circling Kes and Chirrut with their rifles ready. Soon enough, another pair of partisans—size bigger than normal human—came out, followed closely by the near-human.

 

“Came to supply me with more target practice, Rebel?” her voice was low and hoarse, and bright yellow eyes were terrifying to look at, even through Cassian’s scope.

 

“I came to make a new bargain.” Kes said calmly.

 

Her laugh echoed across the mountain.

 

“Do you now?”

 

“I’ll return this to you,” Kes took out the data drive and held it high. “But you have to let me put it into your system myself, then I will pick up my crew personally and leave this planet.”

 

Rhaj shouted something in a foreign language and all the surrounding partisans suddenly raised their weapons higher, fingers ready on the trigger.

 

“Wait! WAIT! Alright, let him go instead.” Kes pointed his free hand towards Chirrut, who clutched his staff more firmly.

 

Rhaj moved closely towards the monk, then waved her hand in front of his face.

 

“He’s blind.” Kes confirmed, pulling one of Chirrut’s hand and shoved the data drive in it.

 

Rhaj glared down at Kes one more time before turning his body and returned to the fortress. Her bodyguards tugged and pushed violently at Chirrut as the monk cleverly pretended to stumble along his way inside. The other partisans followed closely except for one ordered to keep an eye on Kes.

 

A minute, then two, passed. The silence was just beginning to feel too uncomfortable when a series of blaster sound and faint signature thud produced by Chirrut’s staff could be heard from inside the fortress.

 

“Kill the blind man! Kill him!”

 

A flash of blaster appeared from Kes’ direction and the partisan guarding him now laid dead on the ground. Moments later Chirrut was seen running out of the entrance, joined by Kes as they took position behind same large rock that hid Baze from plain sight.

 

“Light them up, Melshi!”

 

The blast threw out ashes and stones from inside the dark entrance, followed by a loud thundering noise as the mountain top cracked and slowly crumbling down. Screams and shouts could be heard from inside the fortress along with thumps of large rubbles crashing everything along its way.

 

“I have visuals. Get ready,” Kes’ voice heard through the commlink.

 

Cassian tightened his grip, waiting for the first sight of the partisans from behind a thick fog of dust. There was a flash of metal before some Rebels closest to the fortress screamed:

 

“Scout Transports!”

 

Three AT-STs burst out and opened fire as Cassian gave the order to engage. Waves of partisans came next, their blaster bolts flashes at every direction towards the Rebels, only to be welcomed by Cassian and the other snipers, as well as Baze and his heavy repeater cannon. Chirrut himself managed to take down one AT-ST with his lightbow.

 

With two remaining Scout Transports, the enemy kept pushing forward, adding grenades to their ammunition. The earth trembled as the explosives hit the ground, and Cassian screamed his order for the snipers to take out the bombers first. Beside Kes, Baze started loading the rocket into his cannon and moments later another AT-ST unit fell to the ground with loud explosion, killing several partisans around it.

 

Eventually the Rebels manage to get the upper hand with less and less partisans come out of the fortress, while dead bodies had piled up outside. The mountain top hadn’t stop collapsing, reducing its height to half, but…

 

“Kes, do you have visuals on Rhaj? Or the hostages?”

 

“No, I haven’t.” Kes replied slowly.

 

Peeking through his scope, Cassian tried to scan every corner of the mountain looking for small hole the map might have missed or a hidden way out somewhere on the nearby rocks. On the battlefield below, Melshi and his ground unit had stopped firing after the last partisan met his end. Chirrut suddenly moved forward from his earlier position beside Baze, walking towards the pile of dead partisans, then kneeled on one leg, putting one hand on the ground—his way of listening to distant footsteps. After a while he stood up and returned to his position beside Kes. “They’re coming.”

 

In the longest one minute of Cassian’s life, he knelt perfectly still while his eyes fixed on the fortress’ entrance. The wind howled around them, clearing the last fog of dust and revealing the now devastated form of the mountain.

 

And then, for the first time in what feels like forever, Cassian saw her. _His_ Jyn.

 

The wave of relief in his heart was cut short upon assessing her condition.

 

Jyn’s expression hardened as she moves forward, limping on her right leg, hands shackled tightly behind her back. There was a trail of dried blood starting from the edge of her left eyebrow down to her cheek, and another one peeked from her nose. She almost fell when Rhaj’s bodyguard poked her ribs from behind, but what appeared next made Cassian clenched his jaws so hard and silenced every other noise around him.

 

Two more bodyguards stepped out, one hand stretched in front of them as each of them held a corpse wearing signature Pathfinders uniform. Cassian could hear his own heartbeat thumping loudly in his ears, signaling something close to rage deep inside his core.

 

Moments later, Rhaj Nuala stepped forward from what’s left of her fortress until she was positioned behind Jyn, and with a swift more she took out a vibroblade and rest it on the pulse point on Jyn’s neck. Cassian gripped his rifle so tightly his fingers turned white.

 

“Beautiful, aren’t they?” Rhaj waved her free hand towards the corpses. Kes moved forwards, threw away his blaster and put his hand on the air.

 

“Let her go.”

 

“I came to bargain, too,” she ignored Kes’ demand. “You _alone_ will escort us to my men guarding your ship. You will _watch me_ leave this planet, and I’ll keep this traitor’s daughter as my favorite target practice.”

 

Kes took one step forward but stopped abruptly as Rhaj added more pressure to her vibroblade and a thin bloody line appeared on Jyn’s neck.

 

Cassian didn’t remember when he’d climbed down from his position, but he did remember the last time he felt enraged—and dread—like this time. It was the day he was made to watch his parents die.

 

“I can shoot you all right here right now.” Kes replied, his voice low and dangerous.

 

Another pressure added to the vibroblade. Blood now running slowly down her neck.

 

Before Cassian could say anything through the commlink, he watched in horror as Kes turned around and started walking away from the fortress. Rhaj grinned, then ordered her bodyguards to move forward, discarding Aron and Carvi’s bodies to join the piles around them.

 

“KES!” Cassian screamed to the comm, but nothing happened. Kes had turned off his comm.

 

_No, no, no, no!_

 

Then it all happened so fast:

 

Just as Rhaj and her partisans moved closer to the last pile of dead bodies, Jyn abruptly stopped walking and started to struggle against her shackle. The bodyguard reacted immediately, kicking the back of her limping leg which prompt her to fall on her side, her back facing towards Cassian’s direction. Rhaj glared down to her, vibroblade ready in hand and just as Cassian was ready to shot at the near-human’s head, he could hear Chirrut’s voice from the commlink, steady and calm:

 

“Shoot her shackle, Captain. Now.”

 

“What—“

 

“Now!”

 

The shackle snapped in two upon contact with his blaster bolt. Cassian saw a flash of metal, and a second later Rhaj had fallen on her back, the bodyguard standing behind Jyn soon followed after with a loud thud.

 

Another flash of metal appeared as Jyn swung her truncheons against the second bodyguard, before moving to incapacitate the third.

 

But just as Jyn had finished dealing with the last partisan, Rhaj was back on her feet, her vibroblade swung violently and landed on Jyn’s waist. Once. Twice. Jyn’s mouth was opened in an inaudible scream, eyes shut tightly as the jolt of pain washed her body.

 

“Jyn!”

 

Cassian screamed, already halfway running towards her, his blaster on hand. Rhaj used this chance to yank Jyn’s body up, and before Cassian can took aim, she had circled her arm around Jyn’s shoulder, and lined her head with Jyn’s, blocking his view. Cassian stopped a few meters from them, trying to find another weak point he could aim but soon distracted by the amount of blood already leaked out from Jyn’s waist.

 

“Shh, shh,” Rhaj whispered to Jyn’s ear as she hissed out of pain.

 

“Let her go,” Cassian demanded, his trembled voice betrayed him.

 

Rhaj only gave him a terrifying grin as she unbuckled her explosive-filled belt. She yanked Jyn’s body once again to make her stood upright, and another gush of fresh blood spilling from her wound. Jyn’s lips had turned dangerously pale, and she’s beginning to lose consciousness.

 

“Now run, little rat,”

 

With a snap, Rhaj released her grip on Jyn’s shoulder and took a long step backward. Cassian surged forward just in time to catch her when he realized that the explosives has been activated. Rhaj laughed hysterically as Cassian dragged Jyn’s body as fast as _he_ can.

 

All of a sudden Baze Malbus arrived out of nowhere, immediately carrying Jyn’s body before they both picked up the pace and get away just in time before the explosives were detonated the effect only surged them forward a few meters. A familiar hum was heard, then seconds later Bodhi had landed their shuttle in front of them. Kes helped stood up and waved his hand to the ship.

 

“You go and take her to back to base immediately. We’ve scanned this sector and there’s no other planet you can stop by. Melshi and his team will stay with me to reclaim our ship, then we will head back to base.”

 

Cassian nodded as he could no longer find the strength to mouth his gratitude.

 

Baze climbed into the shuttle still with Jyn safely cradled in his arms, followed closely by Chirrut and as soon as Cassian got inside, the ramp was closed, taking them off Haashimut’s atmosphere. Once the shuttle had steadied after the jump into hyperspace, Cassian grabbed the med kit and knelt below to start tending to Jyn’s wound.

 

The colors on Jyn’s face had gone, leaving her terrifyingly pale as she fought to keep her eyes open. Baze had laid her on the shuttle’s floor, while Cassian carefully torn her bloodied shirt to clean the wound. From the corner of the ship, Chirrut had started his litany and even K-2 had left the cockpit to help monitor Jyn’s condition.

 

“Her heart rate keeps decreasing,” the droid said in his flat tone.

 

“I know,” Cassian replied quietly as he applied a clean wet towel across Jyn’s wound which immediately turned red. “I know.”

 

Three towels later and Cassian finally able to put bacta patches over her wound. The bleeding has been under control, but the cold hand had once again punches his heart upon the realization that Rhaj had purposely made Jyn lose a lot of blood so she wouldn’t be able to run.

 

“Cassian…” Jyn’s voice was barely there but it’s enough to catch his attention. He caught her hand in his, startled by how _cold_ it was.

 

“I’m here, Jyn. I’m here.”

 

“Home…”

 

“We’re going home now, just hold on for a little longer, alright?” She snapped her eyes on him but her look was distant. She’s slipping away.

 

“Cassian…home…”

 

“I know, Jyn. I’m taking you home. I’m taking _us_ home.” He raised his bloodied hand to cup her face, keeping her eyes on him. He blinked hard as a hot sting caught his eyes and a painful lump in his throat made it hard to speak. He already forgot when was the last time he ever cried.

 

“Cass…” Jyn’s eyes fluttered shut before she managed to finish her sentence, the breath she took didn’t even enough to raise her chest.

 

“Jyn, come on,” A single tear slipped from his eyes. “Come on, Jyn. _Please_.”

 

“Cassian,” K-2 moved closer to him.

 

“Don’t.” _I don’t want to hear it_. Somewhere behind him, Baze had started to pray together with Chirrut.

 

_I can’t…not without you, Jyn._

Jyn’s body stilled.

 

_No, please don’t._

 

Cassian pulled her upper body up gently into and embrace. Her head fell to his chest, weightless.

 

 _Don’t go where I can’t follow_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit late than promised, so sorry :"
> 
> This one's an angsty-themed chapter but worry not, the smutty-themed will return in the next one :)
> 
> So...basically I imagined Haashimut to be a little bit like Mordor x Lonely Mountain with Mount Doom minus the lava river below it. This also the hardest story to write since it's always easier to imagine the scenes rather than actually put it in writing, hhhhh.
> 
> Anyway, the chapter title means "we will defeat them in battle".
> 
> Comments are always welcome :D (you can also comment on grexigone.tumblr.com)
> 
> Enjoy!


	3. Mela en' coiamin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the aftermath of Haashimut's rescue mission, Cassian has to set his priority right.

It was a rather normal day for Cassian as he stepped his foot on the Rebel base, leaving K-2SO on the cockpit of their ship to take care of the technical matters. Another series of missions successfully accomplished, with names to meet, to spy on, to assassinate. He was never a melancholic person—there was no place in the Rebel Alliance for such person. All the emotions from the mission should’ve been shattered and forgotten as soon as he left his aliases behind and return to Captain Cassian Andor.

 

Today however, all he wanted to do is to return to his quarter instead of the War Room for the debriefing.

 

Chirrut had told him once (without being asked, of course) that certain emotions, such as longing, can never go away. You simply forgot it sometimes when your mind was preoccupied by other thoughts, but it would easily slipped back again at times you less expected. Cassian didn’t got the time to respond to it, as always, and Chirrut never care for one either.

 

As he walked to the War Room, Cassian couldn’t help but notice how more and more new faces were now in the Rebellion, while the old one had rapidly disappeared. His mind suddenly wandered to friends and comrades he’d outlived, some of whom had had their light taken away from their eyes right in front of him as he knelt beside them, unable to do anything.

 

He took a deep breath to set it all aside, yet one thought always managed to slip into his mind, even in-between missions: Jyn. Her name sounded foreign to his lips now. But then this thought too, must be pushed away as he stood in front of General Draven and Princess Leia.

 

For now.

 

 

***

 

 

His quarter was empty and dark when he arrived there, safe from a pile of clothes on the edge of his bed and the look Leia gave during the debriefing that still haunts him. With a huff, Cassian dropped his bag to fall on the floor with a loud thud before making his way to the ‘fresher. His next mission would begin in three days and he already dreaded the prospect of having three days of battling with his own moral compass with little other things to do.

 

He splashed the cold water to his face, completely ignoring the fact that it dripped all over his tunic and jacket, in a hope to ease the tense on his nerves. He walked out of the ‘fresher just in time to notice the signature hiss of the quarter’s door opening before letting out a surprised gasp which jolted the other person now standing inside.

 

“Cassian?”

 

He would always recognize that voice, even in the darkness.

 

He almost fell backward when her body crashed into his, arms wrapped tightly around his ribs while his own automatically returned the gesture.

 

“You’re here,” Jyn’s voice muffled by his jacket.

 

He tightened his embrace.

 

Eventually she pulled away to turn on the light, and there it was: the pair of green eyes he hadn’t see for a full three months, smiling in sync with her lips. Cassian felt his own smile blossomed at the sight before pulling her into a kiss.

 

“You arrived early,” he said as they broke the kiss to catch their breath. She didn’t suppose to have a non-conflicting schedule with him at least until next month.

 

“We were evacuated. There was an earthquake so they sent us back in two shifts. I joined the first just because, you know,” she shrugged, “I have a promise to keep.” Cassian smiled, then pushed her away just enough to scan her from head to toe.

 

“You’re good?”

 

“Yeah. And you?” she returned the gesture, their small routine after each mission.

 

“I’m fine.”

 

“Well, since you’re here,” Jyn pricked his hand gently from her shoulders then started walking towards the pile of shirt on the bed. “May I borrow one of these? Spilled food on mine and I ran out of clean tunic for today.” He chuckled and nodded in approval, noticing that there was indeed a dark stain on her stomach.

 

“Reckless,” he said jokingly. Jyn only shot him an annoyed look.

 

“What are you doing in _your_ quarter anyway? You have no stuff in here anymore.”

 

Cassian blinked. Of course. That explain why he felt the room was too empty before.

 

“My bad. I guess I’m a bit tired.” He rubbed his eyes to _looked_ like he is, but mostly to hide the shame of the stupid mistake.

 

“Reckless,” Jyn smirked to him. “Give me a moment to change, then I’ll get you back to where you _belong_.”

 

She pulled her own tunic through her head and slipped into his. She was soon drowned into its size and Cassian watched silently as she rolled the sleeves then unbuttoned her trousers to tug the hem inside.

 

It took her quite a long time to reach this level of trust. Even months after they started sleeping together, Jyn would excuse herself to the ‘fresher every time she wanted to change clothes. He found it weird because she didn’t mind getting undressed in front of him but when he finally asked why, she simply said, “It’s a vulnerable state. I used to think someone may attack me or sneak behind me and I wouldn’t know because I won’t focus on my surrounding.”

 

He missed this intimacy. He missed her.

 

Cassian could feel her body jolted in surprise as he ran his hands along her arms, clearly not expecting him to suddenly stood pressed behind her. He let out a breath in her hair before starting to plant soft kisses on the back of her ear down to the crook of her neck. She shuddered and hissed at each contact.

 

“I’ve missed you, Jyn,” he growled into her ears. She gently spun herself so they’re now stood face to face, lifting both hands to the back of Cassian’s neck to pull his face down to her level. Their lips met with the same desire and fierceness, tongues searched every corner of each other’s mouth while their breath became more ragged and harsh.

 

Jyn’s hands were quickly became greedy on his body, yanking his jacket off to fall on the floor which soon enough joined by his other clothes. Cassian kicked his boots as he pushed her to the nearest wall, slamming her back against it before working his way with her trousers.

 

He lifted one of her now bare thigh, resting his hand behind it and slowly moving it towards her center. Jyn moaned into the kiss when his fingers finally arrived _there_ , already soaked and hot against his hand. Cassian broke the kiss to give her a satisfied look before starting to rub his fingers against her clit. She gritted her teeth and threw her head back, her fingers digging deeper to the skin on his shoulder.

 

“Aren’t you going to take off my shirt— _oh, fuck, Cassian_ ,” His fingers intensified and the rest of her words were swallowed as their lips crashed again.

 

He wasn’t expecting what came afterwards.

 

For a split second all he could think was ‘ _so this is what those poor Stoormtroopers felt_ ’ as Jyn pushed herself free from his grip and use the momentum to _throw_ him until he fell to the bed. His face must have been filled with pure shock because Jyn was smiling ceremoniously as she followed down, straddling him.

 

Cassian was halfway through propping himself up to remove the rest of her clothes when she took hold of his hardness, rubbing her hand along the length, the sensation that came with it made him completely forgot his initial plan as he dropped back to the bed, moaning in pleasure. Jyn shut her eyes tightly as she lined him to her entrance, sinking ever so slowly until he was completely wrapped by her to the hilt.

 

A series of curses in Festian slipped through his lips, ended always with her name as Jyn started to set the pace. Cassian lifted his hips every now and then to meet hers, encouraged by how every contact made her moan loudly. Feeling the sensation building up in his core, Cassian hold her waist with both hands before flipping them over, using her shock to finally remove her borrowed shirt and breast band before picking up their last pace. Jyn lifted one of her hand up to grip on the edge of the bed while using the other to grab on his ass, pulling him deeper with every thrust.

 

“ _There_ , Cassian— _faster_ ,”

 

Desperate for a conclusion, their movement now had completely lost its rhythm. It didn’t take long.

 

Cassian watched as Jyn came undone below him, screaming inaudibly with eyes shut and a few thrust later he followed with her name on his lips, spilling hot inside her until his arms lost the power to support his body and he fell unceremoniously above her, his breath hot on her sweaty chest.

 

When their heartbeats finally came to its normal rate, they lay side by side on the bed, safely tugged below the blanket as Cassian rest his head on Jyn’s collarbone. The peaceful silence stretched between them and the only movement he felt was Jyn’s fingers playing with his hair.

 

“You are thinking,” she suddenly said.

 

“What?”

 

“You are thinking, and that is unusual.” He couldn’t help but chuckle at the words.

 

“Me, thinking. That’s not normal?”

 

“No, not after sex. Usually you sleep.”

 

Others would’ve thought that Jyn was mocking him, but she simply told the truth. He let out a long sigh before continuing, he needed a second opinion anyway.

 

“Yes, I’ve been thinking. I’m planning to leave the Rebellion, Jyn.”

 

Her fingers froze in his hair.

 

Cassian tilted his head up to search her face but instead of shock, what he saw was curiosity. Eyes squinted, brows furrowed, she was trying to read him.

 

“Something happened during your last mission,” was her conclusion. He smiled softly to her in response. Somehow she always _knows_. He took the following silence as a permission to continue.

 

“They send me to Fest—I was just returning from there today.” Jyn’s fingers moved again to stroke his hair. Her gentle gaze gave him the encouragement to fight his old nightmare that his childhood tragedy was. “The mission was not on my hometown, but I was done earlier than expected so—I just have to see it.”

 

 

Another heavy sigh. Cassian shifted to get closer to Jyn’s warm body, staring at the empty wall pressed on her other side.

 

“I didn’t remember seeing Fest without conflict, but when I arrived to my hometown, it was quiet and empty. Every building was exactly the same as the last time I lived there, but what once a crowded war zone now a dead town. I found an old local and asked him what happened the last 20 years, and he said people were simply…go. Trying to find a better life in another part of the planet, or scattered across the galaxy to join anyone wiling to accept them: partisans, Rebellions, the Empire. The old man hadn’t seen any children in the last 7 years.”

 

“Did you find your old house?” Jyn finally asked, her voice was quiet and careful. He nodded.

 

“More like what’s left of it. What did remains was this small bar near the city center.” Somehow Cassian found himself smiled at the memory. “My father used to went there all day. I never knew what exactly he was doing, but every day, when it’s dinner time, my mother would send me there to fetch him. I would always find him  there in the middle of all kinds of people and whenever they saw me, they would tell him ‘hey look, our little mail man has arrived with dinner message!’ and they would laugh while my father shoved me to his lap. I always got carried away with their conversation and we ended up going home very late. My mother would yell at us saying she would stop making dinner tomorrow but of course, it happened again the next day.”

 

Jyn snorted and they both giggled. Cassian was half expecting her to respond with her version of childhood stories but none came out. Her other hand now stroking up and down his arm, laid safely across her bare stomach.

 

“I never really have memories about my childhood, Jyn, but when I was there I suddenly remember my father’s words when we walked home one day after I overheard him and the crowd planning a raid. I was asking him whether I could join them, but he said no. I thought it was because I was too young, so I told him that I’ll join when I’m old enough, and he suddenly stopped, kneeled down and look me dead in the eyes and say he will never want me to join their fight. That he did it now to make sure that I have a future without war.”

 

“A man with value, wasn’t he?” Jyn responded, her voice filled with genuine wonder. Cassian smiled.

 

“He also told me that the fight must not reach my adulthood. ‘The fight will never stop, Cassian.’, he said. ‘With each victory, another one will come. So if the fight ever reach you in the future, it is _you_ that has to stop it.’”

 

Another silence stretched.

 

“He also said surviving the fights would mean I got to live long enough to see my friends didn’t.” Cassian let out snuffle. “Dead for more than 20 years, yet his words still hit me hard like I was 6.”

 

“Fathers, huh?” He could feel her stomach clenched as she chuckled and said nothing more, but he know he eventually have to ask something that has been long overdue. Cassian pulled his body up, leaning on one elbow so he’s now hovering over Jyn, her eyes followed his movement before meeting his own.

 

“Jyn, isn’t it what you want too? Aren’t you also tired of all this fight?”

 

Her eyebrows curved. “And why do you say that?”

 

“On our last mission together, when you patch me up, you asked me about the chances that we’ve spent.” She blinked twice.

 

“I’m amazed you remember that conversation. But I was—tired’s not the right word. I was _worried_ , Cassian. I worried too much that it scares me, and I think it’s stupid because we both know the risk, so—“

 

“Hey, it’s alright,” he raised one hand to caress her cheek, “I’m scared too, Jyn. I’m afraid that one day you will lose hope and it would only lead to two things: either you leave or you become more reckless during missions and…either ways means I’m going to lose _you_.”

 

 _In Wobani you said you were ready to die_ , was what Cassian’s thinking. But he couldn’t even bring himself to say it out loud. In front of him, Jyn’s face was hardened.

 

“You should’ve know by now that I will never leave _you_ , Cassian. Okay, I might be reckless more that I’m even allowed myself to, but I will never put myself deliberately against an obvious death, not that I have promised someone to come home in one piece, so no, you’re not going to lose me in any way—“

 

“I did, Jyn.” Both of them paused, surprised by his hoarse voice. “During those hours of flight from Haashimut, I lost you.”

 

Cassian’s hand absently move to the hard swollen spot on her waist as his head fell back to the rest on her collarbone. He could almost hear that she was opening her mouth to say something, but instead she remained silent while her hand moved to embrace him.

 

He didn’t remember much of the dreadful day, like whose hand was pulling him away from Jyn’s limp body, nor the person that asked him a series of questions in the med bay after informing him that Jyn had listed him as next of kin. It was like he saw everything from a screen he put too close to his eyes: blurred and vague.

 

What he did remember was a droid saying they managed to find her weak pulse though the chance of surviving still very low. He did remember walking like a ghost to their—her—quarter after the doctor said there was nothing else he can do but wait, and to get away from all the eyes staring at him inside the med bay. He did remember turning on the water on the ‘fresher to clean her blood from his hand, rubbing them violently until he could no longer hold the tears that burned his eyes.

 

He also remembered being summoned to the War Room afterwards only to watch General Draven and Princess Leia arguing whether it was _appropriate_ to send him to another mission immediately. The battle ultimately won by the Princess as she hissed to Draven, “Look at him! His mind’s not even here right now! Send him away, then you might as well start building a death memorial for him and Erso.”

 

The memory turned out to be too painful still, as Cassian let out a stuttered breath to fight the lump on his throat. Jyn probably realized this because almost immediately she tightened her embrace.

 

“But I came back, didn’t I?” She pulled his head slowly to meet his eyes with hers. She was smiling softly. “I fought my way back, you know. I haven’t told you this, but that day, when I was fighting to stay conscious, I saw my parents, inside our house in Lah’mu. It felt like they were calling me…home, to join them. But I didn’t want to go. I was trying to tell them that. I tried to tell them that this is my home now,” Jyn pulled him into a kiss, sealing her words.

 

“And the Rebellion is _your_ home, yet you want to leave it?”

 

Her eyes searched his, but she wasn’t judging him. She was looking for more answers.

 

“I will leave the fight, the war, yes. But I’d still be a part of the Rebellion, Jyn. I was thinking of settling down in some planet and help with the recruitment. The Alliance will always need new people, so with the skills that we—I have, I could make it looked like a workshop from the outside while running a sort of intelligence base and recruit center on the inside. I could train them until they are ready to join the Rebellion, and to prevent them from going into some random partisans.”

 

Jyn’s lips curved up into a smirk, “Reminds me of Saw.”

 

“Was he a good mentor?”

 

“The best,” she said proudly. No more trace of hatred in eyes.

 

“You can teach them the way Saw taught you,” Cassian said carefully. So far Jyn had not given him the response he desperately wanted to hear.

 

“Maybe.”

 

He realized now that he wasn’t prepared for the possibility of leaving alone. But just as he was about to give her more reasons, she propped her body up with an elbow and shot him a concerned look.

 

“I’m worried that you will regret this decision in the future, Cassian.”

 

“Jyn,” he raised a hand to cup her cheek, “I would regret more on the things that could happen if I don’t leave.”

 

Cassian pulled her down into a kiss while he bet everything he got into the question.

 

“So, are you with me?”

 

“All the way.”

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

EPILOGUE

 

The rest of Rogue One was not even _that_ surprised when he informed them. Chirrut gave him a knowing smile as per usual, and Baze put both of his heavy hands on his shoulder while saying, “You take a good care of her…and yourself. But mostly take care of her first.” Bodhi gave him an awkward hug and _demand_ him to immediately inform the location of their future home as soon as possible.

 

K-2 gave no calculation, only responded with, “I shall prepare the ship. Tell Jyn to load her own things, I know she won’t need my help.”

 

The strongest opposition, predictably, came from General Draven himself. Cassian was literally being lectured for a good 45 minutes as he paced around the War Room, explaining how his retirement would be a great waste for his skills, but what made him survive the meeting was the sight of Princess Leia, sleeping through the entire ‘lecture’ on her seat beside Draven.

 

The whole ordeal came to an end as the General asked him for the last time whether he was sure with his decision, to which Cassian replied by repeating the same words he said when arrived earlier:

 

“I wish to resign from my position in the Rebel Alliance, Sir. Effective as of tomorrow.”

 

Princess Leia jolted awake upon hearing his words, deliberately walked past General Draven and stretched out her hand to shook Cassian’s.

 

“We accept your resignation, Captain. Enjoy your well deserved retirement, and I wish both you and Sergeant Erso a good luck. May the Force be with you.”

 

Cassian walked out of the room just in time to hear Draven demanded an explanation about ‘Sergeant Erso’ to the Princess.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end; hold your breath and count to ten.
> 
> Nah, it's not as dramatic as Adele's Skyfall but first of all APOLOGIES FROM ME >.< it took me longer than expected to write this last chapter because, well, [insert excuses here].
> 
> ANYWAY, I hope you enjoy reading my short fic and satisfied with the ending. 
> 
> I took a little bit of personal reference for Cassian's father from my own :) he too loves to be around his friends for a loooong time and I always ended up joining their conversation because they're just so damn hilarious (and yeah, I'm a bit homesick).
> 
> Also, the idea of Cassian and Jyn became like a good teacher/mentor for younglings/new recruits always entertains me.
> 
> The sleeping Leia is dedicated to the one and only Carrie Fisher because that would very likely happened should Carrie herself was thrown in the situation XD
> 
> Again, hope you enjoy reading this fic and pls leave any comment!
> 
>  
> 
> (Note: the title means "Love of my life" in Quenya).

**Author's Note:**

> My first smut (with angst, of course), HAHAHA I finally did it! Hope you all enjoy reading it! 
> 
> Next chapters will be added within the next 3 and 5 days (while the idea's still hot in my head or else puff! It's gone).
> 
> Basically I really like the idea of how chill Cassian actually was unless it's Jyn-related. He definitely *cough* loved *cough* her but at the same time she would constantly gave him heart attack. Also somehow I found more story was about Jyn saving Cassian and rarely the otherwise, so here I am trying to explore this topic :P
> 
>  
> 
> Note: Smaradhana is Sanskrit and a title of an old Javanese poem. It can be translated "as the fire of love that burnt lovers' hearts which put them to yearn for their lover, suffering the thirst or hunger for love".
> 
> The titles of the chapters will all be written in Quenya (Tolkien's Elven language) and this one means "I am worried about her".
> 
> (apology in advance if there's any incorrect remarks)
> 
> Enjoy!


End file.
